Cooking for Platypuses
by Shwoo
Summary: Someone in Danville is kidnapping platypuses, and they just made the mistake of kidnapping Perry.
1. Chapter 1

Perry landed his hang-glider out in the suburbs and dropped to all fours. He'd just have to walk the rest of the way home. He wasn't going to take any chances, not after yesterday's incident. If his vision hadn't cleared up an instant before Ferb's...

Perry stretched his front legs, which were stiff from the hang-glider, and started down the street. He enjoyed his job and everything, but he would appreciate it if he was only sent after Doofenshmirtz when Doofenshmirtz was actually doing something evil. Trying to catch a fish was not evil. Not even when he described it as a scheme and linked the whole thing to some imagined slight from his childhood. What a waste of an afternoon.

There were a couple of men nearby, but Perry didn't pay them any attention, until one of them came over and picked him up. Instinctively, Perry went limp.

"We got another one!" said his captor.

"I told you there were a lot of stray platypuses in this town!" said another, slightly deeper voice.

Perry considered the best way out of this situation. He didn't know what these men wanted with him, but his instincts told him that it was nothing good. Besides, he need to get home so he could catch up on the important things in life, like sleeping and TV and sleeping. Maybe a hard kick to the stomach would work. Then he could follow them from a distance and figure out what they were up to. Maybe report them if necessary.

The man turned Perry around to face him, and Perry took the opportunity for a closer look. His captor was wearing a stupid polka-dotted bow tie and had ears so pointy he almost looked like a very, very tall elf. "He's kind of big for a stray," noted the man.

The deeper voiced man, who was a bit smaller, and a lot less elfin, came over for a look. "You're right..." he began, then narrowed his eyes. "Wait a second, I know this one!"

Perry was certain that he didn't know him. He would definitely have remembered the stained t-shirt the man was wearing. That shirt was not appropriate for general audiences. But then, there were people that changed their clothes every day, or so he'd heard.

"He belongs to those kids from down that way!" He pointed in the general direction of Perry's house.

"What... Oh, those kids!" said the bow-tied man. "They were a little young to be zoo-keepers, if you ask me."

Definitely Phineas and Ferb. That explained why he hadn't seen t-shirt man's outfit before. Well, if they knew who he was, they couldn't know what he did. He was going to have to play along for now.

The elfin man grunted. "Maybe they should keep a better eye on him." He shoved Perry into a pet carrier.

Perry decided that he didn't like these people.

.

They didn't carry him far. Perry couldn't see very well from the carrier, but he judged that they only went a few blocks before entering a run-down house that smelled of disinfectant.

The man in the bow tie tipped Perry out into a small room, said "There you go," and closed the door.

There were two other platypuses in there. The room was completely bare of furniture, and paint in some places, but there were two other platypuses. Perry tried not to stare. He almost never spent time with his own species. He'd had a few springtime romances, but he hadn't interacted with them so much as he'd stood there brooding mysteriously. It was fairly impressive, and it was a good cover for the fact that he had no idea what he was doing.

One of the platypus, a male, sat in a corner and stared at the wall. The other stood her ground in the centre of the room. She narrowed her eyes at Perry and growled softly.

Perry understood from the growl that the room was not her territory, but that she was claiming it temporarily. He crouched, accepting that it was hers for however long she wanted it. He'd never felt comfortable in a leadership role.

The female regarded him, made a gesture meaning "name", and another meaning "Mild Undertow In Shallow, Wide River". Then she added "Name?"

Perry thought. He couldn't pronounce his real name, and although he knew that names were important to platypuses, he'd never had much reason to come up with something he could say.

"Name Spur," he signed at last.

Undertow walked over and inspected his back legs. "Don't have," she observed.

Perry's poisonous spurs had been removed almost as soon as they had emerged. Humans were squeamish about letting their children near animals that could put them in unbearable, months-long agony. "Don't need," he replied. Sometimes he missed them, but it was probably for the best. It would have been hard to resist poisoning Doofenshmirtz in the heat of battle, and not even his nemesis deserved that.

Undertow seemed confused, but she dropped the subject, looked over at the other platypus, and chattered at him.

The other platypus said nothing. He didn't even turn to face them.

"Other name Flotsam," said Undertow, when it became obvious that he wasn't going to introduce himself. "Flotsam wrong mind."

Perry acknowledged what she'd said, then scanned the room for the best escape route. The window didn't look like it opened, and there was no convenient grate, so that just left the door. He hadn't heard it lock, and he doubted that the men had thought it was necessary.

He had to get the innocents out. That was his top priority. Then he could focus on stopping whatever kind of operation was going on here.

"Escape," he said.

Undertow looked at him like he was mentally challenged. "Want to. Can't. All walls."

She walked around the perimeter of the room to demonstrate that there was no way out.

Perry indicated the door with his head. Since it was was her territory, he made a permission-asking gesture and said "Spur clear wall."

That was the closest he could get to offering to open the door. There was no word for door in the platypus language. There was no word for a lot of things. Subtle variations in water flow, different intensities of electrical currents, and plants that didn't even grow in America, yes. Things that humans had probably invented before they'd even seen a platypus, no.

Undertow did not look convinced that he knew what he was talking about, but she gave her permission.

Perry stood in his two-legged professional posture, reached up, and tried the door handle, which turned easily. He walked through and beckoned the others.

They just stared at him.

Perry realised that he'd beckoned them with his front paw, like a human. Of course they didn't understand. He went back to four legs. "Come."

They understood that.

The three platypuses went out in a line, with Undertow at the front and Flotsam in the back. Outside was a much larger room, which was mostly bare except for a couch, a TV, and about ten thousand pizza boxes. More importantly, at the other end of the room was a front door.

Undertow had seen it too. She looked back at Perry and said, "Spur. Clear big wall?"

"Yes," Perry began. Before he could say anything else, a key turned in the lock. He stiffened. "Humans!"

"Hide!" ordered Undertow.

They squeezed under the couch and huddled together. Perry made a face. He didn't know what he'd just stepped in, and he didn't want to know.

He heard the t-shirt man say, "That's the last of... Hey! You forgot to close the door, you idiot!"

"I didn't..." began the elfin man.

"Then who did?" the t-shirt man interrupted. "One of the platypuses?" He laughed.

Perry rolled his eyes.

"Maybe the handle's broken," suggested the elfin man. "Look, they've got to be around here somewhere. I have an idea." There was a rustling noise, and then a mouthwatering smell wafted over to them.

"Come and get it, you stupid marsupials!" called the elfin man.

Perry frowned. They were monotremes, not marsupials. There was a big difference, and humans never seemed to understand.

Whatever the smell was, it was getting stronger, and more alluring. He wanted to eat that smell. He really, really wanted to eat that smell.

He felt Undertow start to move forward, so he bit her leg.

She whirled around and growled, more loudly than before.

Perry widened his eyes. There was no way the men hadn't heard that.


	2. Chapter 2

Footsteps approached, and Undertow backed further under the couch, only stopping when she hit Flotsam. Perry stood his ground. Maybe he could convince them that there was only one platypus under here.

An hand grabbed for him. Perry darted out of the way, and amused himself by figuring out all the ways that he could break those fingers. He wouldn't, of course. It was too risky to start using his secret agent skills.

The arm withdrew, and came back holding a light brown sphere that would have looked unappetising if it wasn't for the smell emanating from it. Perry dug his feet into the carpet. It took all the willpower he possessed not to lick that hand.

Someone ran into him from behind, pushing him into the hand and into the food. Unable to help himself, Perry snapped up the sphere, which tasted even better than it smelled.

The tall man pulled him out and set him down on the floor, next to a bag of the wonderful food. Perry stuck his bill down the top, trying to open it further so he could eat even more. He couldn't remember who he was or what he was doing there. All he knew was that he needed more of this food. He'd be happy if he could just get more food. He remembered that he had hands, so used them to untie the top. It was a good thing he was a secret agent, or... Or... He was a secret agent. The food was a trap. Perry remembered what was going on with a jolt, and looked around to make sure the humans hadn't seen him.

To his confusion, he was back in the smaller room. So were Undertow, Flotsam, and a new platypus who didn't look much older than a hatchling. They were all eating the wonderful, addictive food. Perry waved his hand in front of Undertow's face and chattered, but she didn't seem to notice. Perry wasn't surprised. Even now, the smell was hard to resist.

He sealed his nostrils and gargled some of his emergency mouthwash. He'd have to act fast. He couldn't hold his breath forever, and he could feel his will fade with every second.

Perry put away the mouth wash, took out a laser, and shot the bag he'd been eating from. It disintegrated, without leaving even a scorch mark behind.

The next bag he targeted was the young platypus's. She was just a child, like Phineas and Ferb. This shouldn't be happening to her. Or anyone really, but especially her.

He shot Flotsam and Undertow's bags in quick succession.

There was a long, confused pause.

Undertow growled at Perry. This was a threatening growl, telling him that he'd undermined her authority by biting her and destroying her food.

Perry put the gun away and dropped to all fours so that he could talk. He didn't bother with apologies. "Food bad. Food wrong."

Undertow glared.

To Perry's surprise, Flotsam walked between them and clumsily said, "Food wrong, bad. Spur say. Spur right."

Undertow glared at him instead. Perry was beginning to worry that there'd be a fight. He'd win easily, but that was the problem. It wouldn't be fair. And somebody could get hurt if he wasn't careful.

Undertow looked past Flotsam, and her stance softened. "Wattle!" she said, using the sign for a yellow, Australian flowering plant. She seemed to be addressing the young platypus.

"Wait Undertow," said Wattle, looking guilty. "Wait long time. Search Undertow. Human catch Wattle. Wattle here."

Undertow made a comforting gesture.

Perry was glad for the respite, but he couldn't relax until they'd got out of there. Now he was certain that the men were up to something sinister. "Escape," he said.

Undertow transferred her attention back to him. She seemed a bit calmer, but her expression still wasn't particularly friendly. "Escape later. Answer now. How human?"

Perry gave her a blank look, indicating that he didn't understand the question. They were wasting time. Maybe challenging Undertow for dominance wasn't such a bad idea after all. But then, what would stop him from challenging everyone and forcing them to agree with him on everything? Being stronger didn't make him more right.

Undertow walked to the door. "Spur," she said. "Human clear wall. Spur."

When she saw that Perry still didn't understand, she reared up in a clumsy impression of his professional posture, and fell back down.

Now Perry thought he understood. She thought he was a human when he stood like that. Seemed like everybody else thought that way, himself included, so it was understandable. "Not human," he said. "Platypus copy human."

Undertow made a negative gesture. "See human."

"Spur Human," Flotsam agreed.

Perry stood up on two legs. He couldn't communicate like this, so he didn't try.

Wattle chattered an alarm. "Human!"

Perry stopped himself from shaking his head, and made a chatter of his own. Humans could make a confusing variety of sounds, but he'd never met one who could vocalise like a platypus.

He dropped to all fours and chattered again. "Both chatter. Both platypus. Escape!" They had to get out of there before the men gave them more food. He didn't think he could resist it again.

"Spur copy human," conceded Undertow. "Why?"

Perry wrinkled his forehead. Explaining would be a lot easier if there was a platypus word for "secret agent". Or "job".

"Spur... fight human," he said at last. "All days. Different human give..." He sat down, dug into his fur, and showed them his money.

The others came over to get a better look at it.

"Eat thing?" said Wattle doubtfully.

"Play with thing!" suggested Flotsam.

How could he explain money? It had taken weeks to understand it himself. "Give thing human," he tried, putting the money away. "Get everything."

He got three blank looks in return.

"Who fight?" said Flotsam. He looked almost interested. "Humans different all."

Perry smiled, though he knew the others wouldn't understand what it meant. "Tall. Smart. Stupid. Bad." An adequate description of Doofenshmirtz, he thought.

"Undertow think," Undertow announced. She wandered off to stare at the wall.

Perry groaned inwardly. He had no idea how long it she would take to come to a decision. Platypuses weren't the fastest thinking animals in the world. All they had to do was smash that window, and they'd be out of there.

Flotsam came over to Perry and said "Human!" He stood on two legs and maintained his balance for several seconds before he fell back down.

Perry was impressed. It had taken him more time than he wanted to admit to master bipedal movement, and Flotsam had kept his balance on the first try. "Move tail," he suggested. Flotsam had kept his tail down, and although it was possible to stand like that, holding it stiff was much easier for a beginner. Perry stood up to demonstrate.

Flotsam copied him, but fell as soon as he moved his tail. He tried again, and again, and on his third try, he finally managed to stay upright. He began to fall, windmilled his arms, and just barely regained his balance.

Perry stared. Who had told him how to use his arms like that? He shouldn't even had considered that he could balance with them, let alone done it correctly.

Maybe he was agent material? No, that was stupid.

Flotsam stood up a few more times, and managed to stay upright for longer and longer each time. After a couple of unsuccessful attempts to take a step, he said, "Flotsam human?"

"Flotsam stand human," replied Perry, with a backwards glance to see if Undertow was finished yet. "Flotsam not speak human." That was just as important as standing upright, if not more. Humans accepted something that gave off the right body language much more easily than something that stood there with its eyes unfocused.

"Human don't speak," said Wattle, who'd been watching. "All know."

"Human speak sound," said Perry. He knew it was a hard concept to grasp. Although he couldn't remember when he'd begun to understand English, it had always seemed a little unintuitive to him. "Human speak like platypus too, less." To Flotsam, he said "Copy," and focused his eyes. "Human think smart." He unfocused his eyes. "Human think dumb."

"Eyes not dumb," Wattle protested. "Eyes normal."

"Yes," said Perry. "Human _think_ dumb. Human think platypus dumb always." Maybe they were right, and platypuses were dumber than humans. On the other hand, Doofenshmirtz existed.

"Humans wrong," said Wattle, in the signed equivalent of a mutter. It really seemed to be bothering her.

Flotsam focused his eyes and stood up. His expression was still blank by human standards, but it was the kind of blankness that humans understood. Once he fell down, he said "Human think smart?"

Perry stood on two legs and gave a thumbs up. Then he went back to four legs and added "Human word mean 'good'."

Undertow chattered to get their attention. She'd made her decision. Finally. "Spur strange," she began, then headbutted Flotsam, who was still paying more attention to Perry than Undertow. "Spur strange," she said again. "Danger here. Spur help. Spur clear wall again."

Perry acknowledged her with relief, and listened at the door. He could hear voices and footsteps. "Not clear wall there," he said. "Humans see." He walked to the window. "Spur clear wall there." They'd notice him smashing the window as well, but not straight away. He stood up, crouched, and was about to jump when the door opened. Perry hastily went back to all fours.

"Uh, here they are," said the man in the t-shirt.

"Ooh, let me see!" said an unmistakable, high pitched voice.

Perry widened his eyes. Doofenshmirtz! How could it be Doofenshmirtz? He'd already had a scheme today! Had that whole fishing trip just been a decoy? Perry had had to sit there and listen to him for _hours_.

Doofenshmirtz pushed his way past the other men. "Now you're sure none of these platypuses are suave, semi-aquatic agents?"

At the same time Perry chattered, and said "Danger! Human Spur fight!" Doofenshmirtz might notice the sound, but there was no way he'd notice anything else. Platypus body language was always lost on humans.

"Ooh look! They fear me already," Doofenshmirtz said, delighted.

"Spur fight human?" Wattle asked.

Perry couldn't take that risk, not while his kidnappers were still there. "Can't now. Later."

"You got everything you need, Mr Doofenshmirtz?" said the man in the t-shirt.

"It's Doctor! Doctor!"

The man in the t-shirt rolled his eyes behind Doofenshmirtz's back

"Flotsam fight human," suggested Flotsam, looking hopeful.

"No!" said Perry, so empathetically that the humans probably would have noticed if they'd been paying attention. It was very, very difficult for a platypus to fight a human on their level. He could do it, but he'd been trained for it all his life.

"Whatever," said the t-shirt man. "As long as we're still getting paid."

They left the room, talking quietly to each other. Perry couldn't see their lips perfectly, but he could lipread well enough to know that they were saying. They were insulting Doofenshmirtz, quite graphically. That was uncalled for, he thought, as he watched to make sure they left the house.

"Odd job union," said Doofenshmirtz conversationally, pointing backwards. "Nice guys. Now..."

Perry jumped up, put on his hat, and launched himself at Doofenshmirtz.

"Perry the Plat...?!" Doofenshmirtz didn't even get to finish his sentence before Perry latched onto his face and punched him in the nose. Doofenshmirtz staggered backwards, and reached into his pocket for a remote control. "Hah!"

Perry wound up for another punch. As he did, he took a deep breath and his nostrils filled with the smell of the food. Unable to help himself, he looked around, giving Doofenshmirtz the chance to throw him off.

He flew towards a bowl of food that hadn't been there before, landed in it, and forgot everything.


	3. Chapter 3

Undertow didn't completely understand what was happening, and hadn't since those other humans had found her scavenging in a garbage bin a few streets away, but she knew that the white and grey human was bad, and that Spur had attacked him.

When the food appeared, she ran for it, but Spur fell out of the sky and got there first. As soon as he took a bite, a shiny metal net came out of the ceiling and landed on him. He didn't seem to notice. He was too busy eating.

Maybe Spur was right about the food being bad. Maybe the human had put it there to distract Spur from attacking him. It was a troubling thought.

The human made some sounds. "It... It really works!" He put his face up close to Spur, who ignored. "Do you like my new recipe for platypus food, Perry the Platypus? The science behind it is a little complicated... You see, every creature has these little desire molecules in their brains. Or is it their nose? I... Whatever. So anyway. Desire molecules. I have designed a new kind of molecule that fits perfectly with platypus desire molecules! And... Perry the Platypus, are you listening?"

Undertow tried to work out do while the human was distracted by jabbering. First, she had to protect Wattle. Wattle was a lot healthier now than she'd been last winter when Undertow had found her abandoned in the snow, but she was still too young to survive on her own. And Flotsam... Flotsam's mind wasn't right. Spur was weird too, but he could obviously take care of himself. He was so clean and well-fed that he probably lived in a house with a human, and she was sure they'd come and get him if he was gone for too long. He'd be fine.

"Escape," she said to the other two.

Flotsam didn't say anything, but he stared at Spur. He didn't seem to want to leave without him. She'd never seen Flotsam so attached to anyone before, but she'd never met anyone who outstripped him in strangeness either.

Wattle was looking at Spur too. "Spur danger?"

"Spur fight all days," replied Undertow. He didn't need their help. He could take care of himself. Flotsam and Wattle couldn't.

The human seemed frustrated. "I call it platynip! I... Look at me, Perry the Platypus! I'm talking to you!" He reached into the net and pulled Spur away from the food. Without even looking, Spur closed one of his front paws and hit him with it. It looked like it hurt.

Spur opened his eyes wide, spat out what was in his mouth, stood like a human, and used a strange tool to make the food vanish. He looked at the human with his eyes narrowed.

"Hey!" The human was making more sounds. "Th... That stuff wasn't cheap, you know. Okay, hang on, let me find some more..."

Spur went back to being a platypus and said "Escape! Spur all right."

Undertow started to move, but Flotsam and Wattle didn't follow.

"Disappear trap!" Wattle suggested.

"Can't," replied Spur. "Trap shiny."

"Hey, what happened to all the spare- Perry the Platypus, what are you doing?"

Spur looked back at the human, but he didn't stand like a human.

Suddenly, Flotsam stood like a human and chattered. Undertow didn't know much about human stances, but it seemed like he was holding his front legs in the same way that Spur had earlier.

The human changed his stance. "Two Perry the Platypuses?!"

Spur started to make the gesture for "no", then seemed to change his mind and said "Flotsam copy Spur human stance. Flotsam not copy Spur platypus stance." He stood like a human and moved his eyes upwards.

Flotsam copied him exactly.

"Don't give me that look, Perry the... Uh..." The human looked around at Spur, who immediately dropped to all fours.

"Pull thing," Spur told Undertow indicating a rope hanging down from the net.

"Huh?" said the human, turning to look back at Flotsam.

Spur did want their help now. He might be strange, but if he wanted assistance, Undertow was prepared to give it. She didn't understand what he was having Flotsam do, but he seemed to know how humans worked, so she trusted that whatever it was, it was helping.

Flotsam turned the corners of his mouth up and half closed his eyes.

Undertow started towards the net, keeping one eye on the human.

The human rubbed his head. "What? Are... Are you cloning yourself now?"

Flotsam moved his head from side to side.

"You're not a clone?" said the human. "You're... Wait a second! The Perry the Platypus in the net is a decoy!"

Flotsam kept his mouth turned up and moved his head up and down.

Undertow reached the net and stared up at the rope, trying to judge its height. It was too high to reach even if she stood on her hind legs, but she could probably grab it if she jumped.

"So you had a backup plan," said the human. "Huh. Uh..." Suddenly he reached down and grabbed Wattle. "Well so did I!"

Undertow forgot about the rope and rushed towards him, hitting him in the leg.

The human looked down. He didn't seem to be hurt. "Oh, don't tell me you're Perry the Platypus too."

Undertow had never actually attacked a human before - she'd never been so sure that they meant harm - but she had an idea of where the vulnerable parts were. She grabbed the unattached skin of the human's legs with her front paws and hauled herself up. She had to at least get to the top before she could do any serious damage.

The human made a loud yelping sound and said "Get it off! Get it off!" He shook his leg so violently that Undertow flew off and hit the wall.

Dazed, she stared across the room at Spur.

"Spur save Wattle!" said Spur, a bit desperately. "Pull thing!"

Undertow righted herself and replied "Human see. Hurt Wattle." The human was clearly looking at her now. He was probably planning to do something horrible if she took her eyes off him.

Wattle looked left, then right, and bit him.

"Argh! Why did you..." said the human, dropping her on the ground. "That really hurt, you know!"

"Platypus smart human dumb," Wattle said smugly.

Undertow didn't know what she was talking about. Of course platypuses were smarter than humans. Humans couldn't even speak. "Wattle run!"

Wattle glanced around, saw the human grab for her, and ran and hid behind Undertow.

The human turned to face them. "You know, I'm beginning to think that whoever came up with "he's a platypus. They don't do much" was a big liar."

Undertow wasn't sure she could pull the rope with the human standing between it and her. Humans were very fast when they wanted to be.

The human seemed to dismiss them, and stood so that he could look at Spur and Flotsam at the same time. "So... If you're out here... And the decoy's in there..."

Undertow started to sneak past, while Flotsam stared blankly. Undertow guessed that Spur wasn't doing anything because he didn't want the human to see him tell Flotsam what to do. This was not good. There was no way that Flotsam could act without Spur's guidance. Even Undertow didn't understand what Spur was trying to do.

The human seemed uncertain. "Why don't you say anything, Perry the Platypus?" He rubbed his chin.

Undertow kept sneaking. As long as he didn't turn around before she got to the rope, Spur would be able to do his impression of a human.

Flotsam began to sweat slightly, brought up one of his front paws, and curled every finger but the thumb. Despite his strange posture, it was obvious that he had no idea what he was doing.

Undertow took a running jump and just managed to catch the rope in her mouth. The net collapsed and Spur launched himself at the human.

"What the- oof!"

Undertow watched the fight with interest. She'd have to remember some of the things Spur was doing for next time. Most of them needed a human stance, but that couldn't be too hard, if Flotsam could do it.

So if she stood like a human, jumped, turned so that her head was facing the ground, pushed off with her front legs, and turned so that she was flying back feet first, she'd hit the human in the stomach and hurt him? It looked easy when Spur did it, but maybe it was a bit too complicated to start off with.

The human crawled away into the big room and looked inside a box. "You see, it's all gone, how did that..."

Spur kicked him in the head.

"Ow! What was that for? All I'm saying is, all my backup platynip is gone, like, like magic! What, is it also odd-job-guys-nip?"

Spur went over to have a look in the box. Flotsam and Wattle followed him, so Undertow did too, making sure her body was between Wattle and the human at all times.

Spur sniffed the box, then took out the tool he'd used to disappear the food and turned up the corners of his mouth.

"Spur speak human?" said Flotsam.

Spur was still standing like a human, so he couldn't answer, but he didn't need to.

"Spur not speak human. Human not speak." Flotsam was even dumber than she'd thought if he didn't know that.

"Oh I see, you disintegrated them all with that... gun... Curse you, Perry the Platypus," vocalised the human. He exhaled loudly. "That's another scheme down the drain. But at least your little friends are cute!"

"Human speak sound sign more sound human speak now!" said Wattle. "Spur say!"

That didn't make any sense. "Sound?" said Undertow. What did sound have to do with anything?

The human reached down for Flotsam. Undertow growled and jumped in front of him.

"Sheesh, what's his problem?" said the human.

Spur moved his eyes upwards.

"What? What'd I say?"

"Okay, okay," said the human. "I can see where I'm not wanted." He walked out of the room, with a backwards glance at Spur.

"Sound!" repeated Wattle. "Human speak sound now! Spur human say what?"

Spur was too busy staring at the human to reply.

"Sound not speak," Undertow told Wattle. What had Spur been telling her? She should never have let her talk to him unsupervised.

The human left without closing the door, and Spur went back to being a platypus. "Human say human leave."

They really did speak with sound? That was stupid.

"What say before?" Wattle pressed.

"Human ask why Undertow defend Flotsam," replied Spur patiently.

"What say before?" said Wattle again.

Undertow had had enough. "Group leave." Even if humans did communicate through sound, this was pointless. They had to go before more humans showed up to menace them.

Spur agreed, and they left the house.

Even outside, Wattle and Flotsam followed Spur. Flotsam even reared up on his hind legs. Spur seemed like he wanted to say something about that, but he didn't.

Undertow followed Spur as well. She was didn't want to let Wattle out of her sight, not so soon after getting her back.

Wattle kept asking Spur about what the humans had said. Spur didn't seem to mind answering, even when Wattle had to ask again because he wasn't making any sense.

Eventually Spur entered a backyard with some small humans. "Oh there you are, Perry!" said one of them. There was no way those sounds meant anything. Sounds just weren't detailed enough. "Look Ferb, Perry made some friends!"

Before Wattle could finish asking, Spur said "Young human say Spur here. Young human say sibling Undertow-Flotsam-Wattle here."

The human that had vocalised reached over to pet Undertow. Undertow growled and backed away. Maybe these humans were good to Spur, but that didn't mean they were good to everyone. "Flotsam-Wattle leave."

Wattle nuzzled the human who had vocalised, so Undertow grabbed her by the scruff of the neck and pulled her away. "Flotsam-Wattle leave!"

Reluctantly, Flotsam and Wattle followed her out of the yard.

"Aw, you're leaving?" said the loud human. "Well, see ya!" He waved his arms over his head.

Flotsam copied him, and the human made a sound like "Ha haha ha!"

For the first time, Spur seemed happy.


End file.
